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Don’t mock the Croc: a journey in vanity, guilt, denial and acceptance

May 4, 2010

A little over a month ago I shared with you all my struggles with working long retail shifts and subsequently, suffering from aching feet. A little over two weeks ago, I found a solution. It took me a while to summon the courage to post this, but it’s time to come clean. I can’t hide behind a lie anymore: I am now the owner of a pair of black, size 8, Malindi-style Crocs. They were, thankfully, only $29.99.

I spend a lot of time mocking the fashion habits of others. In the past, Crocs have often come up as a key target for teasing. I mean, let’s face it — these things are not cute. I hadn’t planned on purchasing a pair until at least my third child, in which I hope I’m at a point where I couldn’t care less what I look like, because I’ll be like, damn, I popped out three kids, mascara-wha!? Anyway, needless to say I walked into the Columbus Avenue Crocs store with a bit of shame. The saleswoman seemed to recognize it instantly, a familiar hesitance mixed with desperation. She recommended the Malindi-style flats on the basis that she wore them for 8-hour shifts and swore by them. Also, they are the least heinous of the Croc flats collection. (You have to give them credit for at least trying to be cute with the teardrop-shaped accents.) And at $30, I thought, well, even if they don’t work out, it’s not like I’m dropping a ton of money here.

I’ve been wearing these shoes during my retail shifts since that day in early April, and I can now call myself a convert. At the end of a double shift, sure, my feet are tired, but there is no throbbing whatsoever. They are so comfortable, I almost look forward to putting them on. I hereby will no longer mock people who wear them for comfort/professional reasons. Now, if you’re wearing them because you think they look cool, we need to talk.

Anyway, I’ll hold on to these for my part-time job future (which unfortunately living in this city, I don’t think is going to cease anytime soon). Rest assured, you won’t see me sporting these in Central Park on a day off, though — I haven’t completely let myself go.

(Shannon, I know you’re dying. Let’s never speak of this again.)

So, comfortable, affordable shoes do exist with at least the original intention of being cute. Maybe one of these days I’ll find all three. Until then, I am rocking my Crocs.

Jesus Christ.

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3 Comments leave one →
  1. May 4, 2010 9:32 pm

    Hey, I’ve never openly mocked nurses or waitresses who wear them (OK, maybe if they wear the traditional “clog” style we all know and loathe). They aren’t completely heinous and it’s not like you’re wearing them out dancing. Live and let live.

    (But please don’t ever wear them anywhere else. LOVE!)

  2. June 25, 2010 2:46 am

    These shoes are quite good for swimming, if you can believe that. By this I mean swimming in areas that’s rough on the feet. I was at The Thousand Islands, New York a couple years back, which is infested with what are called Zebra Mussels, which are very sharp. Being from Hawaii, it didn’t much bother me, I’ve got tough feet, but it was a bit of an annoyance and too much is too much. I threw a pair of them on, they were absurdly comfortable and I couldn’t feel any of those damnable mussels cutting at my heels.

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  1. I put some new shoes on and suddenly everything is right « Thrifty Threads

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